Overloaded With Attributes Chapter 51
Canned Pineapple
About six hours have passed since that first Mochi fight. The bus was leaving soon, so Kazura-san and I headed back to the surface. ...Well, she "commuted by bike," anyway.
Wait, if Shouko-san rode tandem with Kazura-san here... how did she get home?
Hm? You want a description of the fighting in between? Look, my combat style is...
Enter the Mochi's attack range (about 15 feet).
Wait for it to jump at my face, predicting the trajectory from experience.
Take one step back while holding my rapier out.
Stab.
...That's it. Do you really want me to describe that incredibly boring, anti-climactic scene dozens of times? I don't. In fact, I'd probably punch anyone who tried to make me.
Now, Kazura-san's fighting style was at least entertaining. She'd full-swing a heavy battle-ax that looked like it belonged to a dwarf. When a Mochi leaped, she'd smash it with the flat of the ax. It was a flashy, "Full-Impact" style with a satisfying THWACK!
"By the way... aren't you exhausted from swinging that heavy thing around for hours?"
"Of course Kazura tired."
Then maybe fight with a little less wasted energy...
"...So. You spent all day 'playing' and 'flirting' with a new woman while you 'left us' to rot. Do you have any excuses... or 'final words'?"
"That's a pretty hostile way to put it! And what the hell is a 'cave date'?" As someone with deep-seated trauma from getting heatstroke in a certain Okinawan theme park's cavern, I can assure you, caves are terrible date spots.
"Well... it was interesting to see someone else's fighting style up close. I guess it was 'fun'?" ...Not that she stayed close. Halfway through, she took off on her own like a dog let off its leash. I was near her, but I wouldn't call it "adventuring together."
"Yuugiri-kun... do you... prefer that type of woman?"
"If that's a 'Shizuka-san vs. Kazura-san' question, the answer is '100 to 0, Shizuka-san'."
"R-Really? ...Oh... is that so." I mean, have you seen her? She gets that really scary look on her face sometimes. I wouldn't be able to relax at all.
"Then what about me and Akashi-san?"
"I thought we were talking about Kazura-san!"
In the end, I made it back without a scratch. My first official dungeon crawl—slime-slaying—was complete. I went back to the school, and then headed home...
"Welcome home! Would you like dinner? Supper? Or... me? ...Just kidding."
"THAT'S TERRIFYING!"
...For some reason, Kazura-san was relaxing in my living room, wearing my black cat kigurumi.
"Shouko-san, you can't just bring home strays. Especially not live ones."
"I... I am so sorry. I failed you. I tried to defend Yuugiri-san's pajamas with my life, but..." ...Apparently, they got into a tug-of-war, but Shouko-san let go, terrified that the pajamas might get damaged.
"So, a Judgment of Solomon, huh..." Anyway, the pajamas aren't what I'm confused about. Why is she here before me?... I guess she's just visiting her relative.
"Hey! You can call Kazura a 'stray,' but at least call me a 'creature,' not a 'corpse'! And Shouko, why are you apologizing?! Fufu, you're so lucky, Yuugiri. You get to be with Kazura even after leaving the dungeon!"
"...Could you please take her back where you found her?"
"Unfortunately, I found her at our doorstep..."
"My, these strays are getting aggressive... So, Kazura-san. What is the meaning of this—I mean, how can I help you?"
"You didn't really change what you meant! Fufu, isn't it obvious? Kazura was bored all alone in the hotel room, so Kazura came to play! And... Kazura wanted to see what kind of life Kazura's cousin is living with a man."
"I get it. Your big sis got a boyfriend, and now you're all lonely, aren't you~?"
"...This little shit... he was so docile in the dungeon... And for your information, Kazura's birthday is in July. Shouko's is in October! That means Kazura is the 'big sister'!"
"Whatever you say."
"That's it. Let me punch you. Twice."
Hey, even I'm not going to talk smack to someone who I asked for help, right? And if a high-level Explorer punched me, I'd die. Instantly.
"Muu... Yuugiri-san. Flirting with your fiancée's relative right in front of your fiancée. ...Are you... trying to torment me?"
"I'm hurt. Have I ever been mean to you, Shouko-san?"
"...About three times a day, yes."
"Fufu, well, if that's true—it's only because you're so cute every day."
"...Yuugiri-san."
"...Shouko-san."
"Ugh, what is this disgusting, sappy atmosphere?! Do you two do this stupid, brain-cell-killing routine every day?"
"Oh, you're still here, Kazura-san? If you're hungry, I can get you some bubu-zuke. Though all we have is raw rice with water on it."
"That's not even trying, is it?! And Kazura is not leaving! Kazura is staying here tonight!"
"Look, we weren't expecting guests. We don't have a guest bed or futon... Ah, wait. Shouko-san, isn't your futon unused?"
"It is. I air it out with the futon dryer every three days so it doesn't get mites, but I haven't used it."
"...Are you... making Shouko sleep on the floor?"
Crap. That voice. It sounds like it's crawling up from the depths of hell.
"Hah... you really have no idea, do you? As if Yuugiri-san would do such a thing. I... of course... sleep in his bed... with him..."
"...? ...?? ...??? ...!? ...!! ...!?!? Eh? Hah? EEHHH?! HAAAAAAAH?! Y-You two... sleep together every night?!?"
"Whoa, calm down. We're engaged, but we haven't done anything like that. We're both pure. I just get lonely by myself, so I have her hold my hand while I sleep." ...Though my "son" is at critical mass from how cute she is.
"That's... kinda adorable... No, wait! You can actually sleep with a woman next to you?"
"I just said I can't sleep without her next to me. Pay attention."
Kazura-san froze, eyes wide. Since she was finally quiet, I just left her like that and went to my room to change.
"Oh, nice! Hamburgers for dinner!"
"Fufu. The toppings are cheese, a fried egg, and pineapple. And there's cheese stuffed inside, too."
"That's a topping train-wreck... Kazura doesn't want pineapple."
"Eh? We didn't make any for you, Kazura."
"Shouko-san, that's a little cold, even for a joke..."
"...You're... right. Kazura, I'm sorr—"
"You're right. We should at least offer her the canned pineapple."
"Kazura said Kazura don't want pineapple! Give Kazura meat! Meat! That big one right there! ...You know, you've got a real twisted personality."
"I'm often told that."
"Why are you blushing?! Kazura wasn't complimenting you!"
...Why is she acting like a tsundere all of a sudden?
So, I'm taking a bath right now. With Kazura here, it's the only place I can be alone.
"...Status, Open." Even a whisper echoes in here, so I dunked my head underwater to say it. I know what you're thinking, but there's a Level-Max person in my house.
...Yep. Kazura-san. Her level was 50/50. And her stats...
Takatsukasa Kazura Age: 26 / Japanese / ♀ Level: 50/50 / Class: None Total Combat Power: 438 / Equip Bonus: Better than pajamas → Tap [HERE] to view Skill List
...Holy crap, that combat power. That's eight times my strength. She's a monster. And how is her equipment bonus "Better than pajamas" when she's lugging around that giant ax?!
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